Pain, despair, and freezing agony

It's cold.
It's cold outside, colder in the house, coldest in the kitchen, frigid on the back porch (we moved the Guinea pigs to my room so they won't become Pigsicles), and the thermometer says it's 40 degrees.
There's still snow because the weatherman said it was going to stop snowing... some time day before yesterday. But it didn't. It snowed until really early this morning. You'd think there would be fifty feet of snow and we'd be making little igloos, but all there is is about one inch.
Tomorrow I think I won't get out of bed.

They're Taking EVERYTHING

Disney's taking over everything.
EVERYTHING.
They just got Marvel Entertainment.
Next thing you know, there's gonna be little Mickeys dressed as Wolverine in Disney World.
And Britney will have pants.

GET HIM TO STOP

Welcome to my planet. In the mornings I sleep till ten. Then I try to get my younger brother to shut up. This so far has led to somebody storming into the other room. Then I eat and try to get said brother to shut up again.
Repeat until sundown, when we train for our superhero mission in Honolulu, and that's when somebody ends up kicking said brother, who is also a smart aleck. And he makes painfully good points. Grrr.

Happy halloween

Or it would be if it wasn't 43 degrees outside. We'll all freeze. So I'm stuck here rather than There.
I went into the woods today and the stream is running about 30 miles an hour. There's a hill across from it, and I decided, "oh, why not," and started walk/climbing up it. And at the top...
...There's a pasture with about ten or so cows in it. And either a rabbit or a large chihuahua. Well, I'd been expecting something along the lines of 1) another hill 2) a cliff, or 3) A PORTAL TO ANOTHER DIMENSION, or even better, a lake, but no. All I get is a barbed wire fence, a rabbit dog, some cows and an almost 90 degree angled hill. So I walk/fall back down the darned hill, get to the bottom, make an arrow out of dead, damp sticks pointing up the hill so I know where the newly eroded trail is, cross the stream, get lost because I can't find the trail from our pasture to the woods, climb up another hill, find another pasture, get lost trying to get back from THERE, find a nine-foot tall cliff which, if I fell off of, would send me into the creek which is five inches deep, run from there, find the trail, get about a hundred feet from the trailhead, sit down on a log, which breaks, get back home, where I find out I'd spent less than an hour in the woods, also find out we're all going to FREEZE for said reasons.
Nothing is continuing to operate.
That and the movies Mom rented are going to kill me.

Stupid Intersnail.

I have a name for dial-up internet.
We have the InterSnail.
Also
NOTHING WORKS.
Here's a list.

1. InterSnail
2. My computer
3. Common Sense
4. the Wi-Fi at Starbucks
5. The UNIVERSE!!!!

How to make something electronic work:

1. Argue with it.
2. Yell at it.
3. Push the power button until it submits.
4. Turn into a dinosaur, stomp it into bits and evolve into a bird who doesn't care.
5. Change the batteries.
6. Pay 200$+ for somebody else to fix it.
7. Get a new one.
8. Beg it to work.
9. Shake the screen until something happens.
10. Give up and come back later.
11. Read the user manual.

Chances of this working:

1. Nothing will happen.
2. Nothing will happen.
3. It'll fix it.
4. Great! You broke it.
5. You'll do something wrong and it'll break it.
6. Great! You broke it.
7. You'll go broke.
8. It'll fix it.
9. Great! You broke it.
10. It'll fix it.
11. You'll die crazy and bored because it took so long and you still don't know how to fix the thing.